Help for Adult ADD / ADHD

Managing adult ADD / ADHD: What you need to know

Adult ADD/ADHD can present challenges across all areas of life, from getting organized at home to accomplishing what you are capable of at work. It can be tough on your health and both your personal and on-the-job relationships. Your symptoms may lead to extreme procrastination, trouble making deadlines, and impulsive behavior. In addition, you may face the challenge of feeling that friends and family don’t understand what you’re up against.

Fortunately, there is a lot you can do to help yourself tackle these difficulties and live a productive, more organized—and happier—life. There are many skills you can learn to help get your symptoms of ADD/ADHD under control. You can improve your daily habits, learn to recognize and use your strengths, and purposefully develop skills that can help you work more efficiently, increase organization, and interact better with others. Part of helping yourself manage your ADD/ADHD may be educating others to help them understand what you are going through.

Self-help strategies can go a long way toward helping you manage your ADD/ADHD symptoms, but change won’t happen overnight—these strategies will take practice. Keep in mind that improving your symptoms will require dedication, patience, and, perhaps most importantly, a positive attitude.

Adult ADD/ADHD self-help: Tips for managing stress and boosting mood

Due to the impulsivity and disorganization that often come along with ADD/ADHD, you may struggle with erratic sleep, unhealthy eating, or the effects of too little exercise—all issues that can lead to extra stress and bad moods. Unhealthy habits can leave you feeling out of control of your emotions. The best way to stop this cycle and start regaining this control by taking charge of some of your lifestyle habits and creating healthy new routines.

All people can benefit from eating well, getting plenty of sleep, and exercising regularly, but if you are affected by adult ADD/ADHD, you stand to gain even more. Focusing on these three areas can help you stay calm, avoid mood swings, and in many cases fight the symptoms of anxiety and depression. Healthier habits can reduce symptoms like inattention, hyperactivity, and distractibility, and routines can help your life feel predictable and steady.

Get enough exercise and spend time outdoors

Working out is perhaps the most positive and efficient way to reduce hyperactivity and inattention from ADD/ADHD. Exercise can relieve stress, boost your mood, and calm your mind, helping work off the excess energy and aggression that can get in the way of relationships and feeling stable.

• Exercise on a daily basis.
• Choose something vigorous and fun that you can stick with, like a team sport or working out with a friend.
• Increase stress relief by exercising outdoors—people with ADD/ADHD are said to benefit from sunshine and green surroundings.

Get plenty of sleep

Sleep deprivation can increase symptoms of adult ADD/ADHD, reducing your ability to cope with stress and maintain focus during the day. Simple changes to daytime habits go a long way toward ensuring solid nightly sleep, which can lead to huge improvements in your emotional balance, attention, and productivity.

• Avoid caffeine late in the day.
• Exercise vigorously and regularly, but avoid moving around at least an hour before turning in.
• Create a predictable, and quiet “bedtime” routine.
• Take a hot shower or bath just before bed.
• Stick to a regular sleep-wake schedule, even on weekends.

Eat right for ADD/ADHD

Eating healthfully can reduce distractibility, hyperactivity, and decrease stress levels dramatically. Taking control of your eating habits means you can avoid low moods, weight gain, and distraction due to hunger or compulsive eating.

• Eat small meals throughout day.
• Avoid sugar as much as possible.
• Eat fewer carbohydrates, while increasing your protein intake.

Adult ADD/ADHD self-help: Tips for getting organized and controlling clutter

Organization is a challenge for many people, but can be especially challenging for individuals with AD/HD. In fact, the hallmark traits of ADD/ADHD—inattention and distractibility—make organization perhaps the biggest challenge adults with the disorder face. If you have ADD/ADHD, the prospect of getting organized, whether it be at work or home, may leave you feeling very overwhelmed.

It is possible, however, to counteract this overwhelmed feeling and effectively organize your home or office. You can learn to break tasks down into smaller steps and follow a systematic approach to organization. By implementing various structures and routines and utilizing tools such as daily planners and reminders, you can set yourself up to maintain organization and control clutter.

Develop structure and neat habits—and keep them up

To organize a room, home, or office, the most effective tactic is to categorize your objects, deciding which things are necessary and discarding or storing things that are not. To organize yourself, it can be helpful to become an avid note-taker and list-maker. Once you set yourself up for success with a newly organized room and system of self-organization, maintain the clean slate with regular, daily routines.

• Create space. Ask yourself what you need on a daily basis, and find storage bins or closets for things you don’t. Designate specific areas for things like keys, bills, and other items that can be easily misplaced. Throw things away that you do not need.
• Use lists. Make use of lists and notes to yourself, which are useful in keeping track of regularly scheduled tasks, projects, deadlines, and appointments. If you decide to use a daily planner, keep all lists and notes inside it. You can find information about daily planners in the tips for time management section.
• Deal with it now. You can avoid forgetfulness, clutter, and procrastination by filing papers, cleaning up messes, or returning phone calls as they come in, not sometime in the future.

Tame your paper trail

If you have adult ADD / ADHD, a major part of your disorganization might be with paperwork—in endless piles or even strewn across your kitchen, desk, or office. If you take some time to set up a paperwork system that works for you, you can streamline handling the paperwork in your life. Designate an afternoon to get yourself set up for success.

• Set up a filing system. Use dividers or separate file folders for different types of documents (such as medical records, receipts, and income statements). Label and color-code your files so that you can find what you need quickly.
• Deal with mail on a daily basis. Set aside a few minutes each day to deal with the mail. Either trash it, file it, or act on it.

As an adult with ADD/ADHD, you are capable of learning organizational skills and strategies that can help you clear away the clutter in your life.

If being disorganized is your biggest roadblock due to ADD/ADHD, you may want to find out more about how to get your home or office in order.

Adult ADD / ADHD self-help: Tips for managing your time and staying on schedule

As an adult with ADD/ADHD, you may easily lose track of time or miss deadlines all too often. You may procrastinate, underestimate the amount of time you need for tasks, or find yourself doing things in the wrong order. Many adults with ADD/ADHD spend so much time on one thing—also known as “hyperfocusing”—that nothing else gets done. These difficulties can leave you feeling frustrated and even inept, and make others impatient.

It is important to understand that trouble with time management is a common effect of adult ADD/ADHD, and it is one you can overcome. There are solutions available for you to better manage your time—and stop feeling behind and inadequate.

Understand time

Adults with attention deficit disorder often have a different perception of how time passes. In order to align your sense of time with that of your friends, officemates and family, use the oldest trick in the book: a clock.

• Become a clock-watcher. Use a wristwatch, timer, alarm, PDA or computer—anything that keeps accurate time and is within your sight at all times. When you start a task, say the time out loud or write it down. Allot yourself limited amounts of time for each task.
• Create a daily ten-minute routine. Attend to filing documents, processing daily mail, paying bills, and other mundane tasks on a daily basis for the same amount of time, and preferably in the same order. If you have a regular process to follow, you can be sure you aren’t missing something important. If you have only ten minutes, you will know when to stop.
• Give yourself more time than you think you need. For every thirty minutes of time you think it will take you to get someplace or complete a task, add ten minutes.
• Plan to be early and set up reminders to leave. Write down appointments for fifteen minutes earlier than they really are. Set up reminders on your computer or on paper to get yourself out the door on time.

Decide what’s first

Because adults with ADD/ADHD often struggle with impulse control and jump from one subject to another, completing tasks can be difficult. Big projects also might seem tough to tackle because of all the small steps needed to get to the end result. You can overcome feeling overwhelmed by organizing what you need to do before diving in.

• Prioritize. Ask yourself what is the most important task you need to accomplish, and then order your other tasks after that one.
• Take things one at a time. Break down large, seemingly overwhelming projects or tasks into smaller, manageable steps.

Learn to say no

Impulsiveness can lead adults with ADD/ADHD to saying yes to too many things, whether it be agreeing to too many projects at work or making too many social engagements. But a jam-packed schedule and too many tasks can lead to you feeling overwhelmed, overtired, and behind. When you spread yourself too thin, the quality of your work suffers and you end up not finishing things you began. Turning things down will help you improve your ability to accomplish tasks, keep social dates, and live a healthier lifestyle. Check your schedule first before committing to something new.

Adult ADD / ADHD self-help: Tips for staying focused and productive at work

If you are a working adult, the symptoms of ADD/ADHD can create special challenges. The things you may find toughest—organization, completion of tasks, sitting still, listening quietly—are the very things you may be asked to do all day long at work.

Juggling ADD/ADHD and a challenging job is no easy task, but there are strategies you can use to counteract your difficulties. The key to succeeding at work despite ADD/ADHD is to tailor your workplace environment so you can take the best advantage of your strong points while minimizing the negative impact of your symptoms.

Get organized at the office

Start with what might need to be a major “spring cleaning” in your office, cubicle, or desk. Then maintain the tidiness and use strategies to help yourself stay organized. Remember that part of being and staying organized is to perform one task at a time, so, even as you clean up, think “brick by brick.” Organization at work does not happen overnight, but it is possible.

• Set aside daily time for organization. A one-time cleaning can help get you started, but to maintain organization, set aside a limited amount of time—10-15 minutes—to clear your desk and organize your paperwork. Experiment with storing things inside your desk or in bins in your office so that they don’t end up in front of you as unnecessary distractions.
• Use colors and lists. Color-coding has been shown to be very useful to people with ADD/ADHD. Manage forgetfulness by writing everything down.
• Prioritize. More important tasks should be done first. Set deadlines for everything, even if they are self-imposed.

End distractions

Whether you have attention issues or not, where you work and what is around you can significantly affect how much you get are able to get done. Look around and try to guess what might take you away from your work. Let your workmates know you need to concentrate, and try the following techniques to end distractions at work.  

• Get a good seat. Where you sit while trying to get work done matters. If you have your own office, great. If you don’t, you may be able to take your work to an empty office or conference room. If you are in a lecture hall or conference, try sitting close to the speaker and away from people you think might chat mid-meeting.
• Minimize external commotion. Face your desk toward a wall and keep your workplace free of clutter. To discourage interruptions, you might even want to hang a "Do Not Disturb" sign. If possible, don’t answer the phone. Let your voice mail pick up and return calls later.
• Save big ideas for later. All those great concepts that keep popping into your head? Jot them down on a pad of paper you keep in your top desk drawer for later consideration.

Stretch your attention span

Adults with ADD/ADHD are capable of focusing—it's just that you may have a hard time keeping that focus, especially when the activity isn't one that we find especially engaging. Boring meetings or lectures may be hard on anyone to keep attentive, but for adults with ADD/ADHD it is a special challenge. In this same vein, following multiple directions is also an area of difficulty for those with ADD/ADHD. Increase your focus and ability to carry out instructions by trying some of the following:

• Get it in writing. If you're preparing to attend a meeting, lecture, workshop, or another gathering that requires close attention, ask for an advance copy of the relevant materials—whether it is a meeting agenda or a lecture outline. At the meeting, use the written notes to guide your active listening and note taking. Writing as you listen will help you stay focused on what the speaker is saying.
• Echo directions. After someone gives verbal instructions, say them aloud to be sure you got it right. You can be professional about this repeat technique by beginning your echo with “I understand you would like me to…” 
• Move around. To prevent restlessness and fidgeting, go ahead and move around—at the appropriate times in the right places. As long as you are not disturbing others, taking a walk or even jumping up and down in place can increase your ability to pay attention later on.

Adult ADD/ADHD self-help: Tips for improving your relationships

Due to the inattentiveness, forgetfulness and lack of impulse control that often come with ADD/ADHD, relationships can be difficult for adults with ADD/ADHD. You may have a decreased ability to self-regulate actions and reactions toward others, which can cause you and others to become overly tense and upset. You may come off as overly aggressive or as not caring enough to listen closely.

Relationship issues are perhaps the most heartrending and distressing—you don’t want to hurt your loved ones or keep a distance from those around you. There are solutions to these problems. You have the power to improve the way you communicate and interact with your friends and family. By actively making changes to benefit others, you will also be helping yourself.

Help for your closest relationship

While adult ADD/ADHD can cause issues in many different types of social settings, it can strike deepest and cause the most problems in your partnership, marriage, or with someone you’re dating—your most intimate and important relationship. Because you are disorganized, your significant other may feel like he/she has to take care of everything from the bills to the childcare. You may be overly forgetful or inattentive, and your partner may be left feeling “tuned out” or like you don’t care. If both people in the relationship understand your ADD/ADHD, you have a chance to work together to build a fulfilling relationship.

• Divide tasks and stick to them. The partner without ADD/ADHD may be more suited to handling the bills and budget, while you manage the children or daily chores.
• Develop a communication code. Have your significant other gently remind you to do something or to listen closely by giving you a nonverbal signal you both agree on.
• Take responsibility. ADD/ADHD or not, you are a full half of your partnership, and need to work on the things that are hard on your spouse or significant other, including communication.
• Create better communication. The most effective communication-building strategies are sometimes the simplest—like the dry erase board for notes to one another and regular to-do lists. In order to avoid misunderstandings, have the partner with ADD/ADHD repeat things that have been said.

Improve communication

The hard truth is that the symptoms of your ADD/ADHD can make conversations quite difficult or uncomfortable for others. You don’t mean to come off as abrasive or uncaring, but your impulsiveness, hyperactivity, or distractibility can get in your way. It is possible to control these symptoms, and have healthy communication with others. To interact positively with the people around you, you need to be attentive, responsible, and able to control impulsive behaviors in conversation. In other words, mind your manners.

• Listen actively and don’t interrupt. While someone else is talking, make an effort to maintain eye contact. If you find your mind wandering, mentally repeat their words so you follow the conversation. Practice not interrupting.
• Ask questions. Instead of launching into whatever is on your mind—or the many things on your mind—ask your friend, spouse, or acquaintance a question. Your inquisition will make him/her feel attended to and appreciated.
• Request a repeat. Don't be afraid to ask the person to repeat himself. If you let the conversation go too long when your mind is elsewhere, it will only get tougher to re-connect.

Educate friends and family about adult ADD/ADHD

Educating your loved ones about ADD/ADHD and the ways in which it affects your social skills and interpersonal behaviors can help alleviate a lot of conflict and blame. If you are working hard at your end to learn strategies to improve your social skills, your friends and family may be more willing to give you a little extra wiggle room if they know what you’re dealing with.

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Authors: Jocelyn Block, M.A., and Melinda Smith, M.A. Last updated June 2011.