Job Loss and Unemployment Stress
Coping with the Stress of Losing a Job
Losing a job is one of the most stressful life experiences, so it’s normal to feel angry, hurt, depressed, scared, grief at all that you’ve lost, or anxious about what the future holds. Job loss and unemployment involves a lot of change all at once which can rock your sense of purpose and self-esteem. While the stress can seem overwhelming, there are many things you can do to take control of the situation, maintain your spirits, and come out of this difficult period stronger and more resilient.
Understanding the stress of job loss
Our jobs are much more than just the way we make a living. They influence how we see ourselves, as well as the way others see us. They give us structure, purpose, and meaning. That’s why job loss and unemployment can be so stressful.
Beyond the loss of income, losing a job also comes with other major losses, some of which may be even more difficult to face:
- Loss of your professional identity
- Loss of self-esteem and self-confidence
- Loss of your daily routine
- Loss of purposeful activity
- Loss of your work-based social network
- Loss of your sense of security
Grief is normal after job loss
Grief is a natural response to loss, and that includes the loss of a job. Losing your job forces you to make rapid changes, which can leave you feeling upset, depressed, or out of balance. Try to accept your feelings and go easy on yourself. While everyone grieves differently, the following coping tips for job loss stress can also help you deal with the grieving process in a healthy way.
And remember: most successful people have experienced major setbacks in their careers but have turned things around by picking themselves up, learning from the experience, and trying again. You can do the same.
Avoiding the pitfalls of job loss
- Taking refuge in your “cave” may provide temporary comfort, but is little help if your time spent there is not constructive. Surrounding yourself with positive, supportive family and friends may better help your self-esteem.
- Venting your anger and frustrations may only make you feel worse if you find yourself in the middle of a “pity party.” There are people who actually enjoy misery and the misfortune of others.
- Drinking is at best a temporary relief, and for some people, can lead to a crippling addiction.
Source: The University of Georgia
Coping with job loss and unemployment stress tip 1: Reach out to stay strong
Your natural reaction at this difficult time may be to withdraw from friends and family out of shame or embarrassment. But don’t underestimate the importance of other people when you’re faced with the stress of job loss and unemployment. Social contact is nature’s antidote to stress. Since the face and heart are wired together in the brain, nothing works better at calming your nervous system than talking face to face with a good listener.
- The person you talk to doesn’t have to be able to offer solutions; they just have to be a good listener, someone who’ll listen attentively without being distracted or judging you.
- As well as making a huge difference to how you feel, reaching out to others can help you feel more in control of your situation—and you never know what opportunities will arise.
- You may want to resist asking for support out of pride but opening up won’t make you a burden to others. In fact, most people will be flattered that you trust them enough to confide in them, and it will only strengthen your relationship.
Developing new relationships after job loss
It’s never too late to expand your social network. It can be crucial in both helping you cope with the stress of job loss and unemployment—and in finding new work.
Build new friendships. Meet new people with common interests by taking a class or joining a club such as a book group, dinner club, or sports team.
Join a job club. Other job seekers can be invaluable sources of encouragement, support, and job leads. Being around others facing similar challenges can help energizing and motivate you during your job search. See Resources section below for help finding a job club in your area.
Network for new employment. The vast majority of job openings are never advertised; they’re filled by networking. Networking may sound intimidating or difficult—especially when it comes to finding a job—but it doesn’t have to be, even if you’re an introvert or you feel like you don’t know many people. See Job Networking Tips.
Volunteer. While unemployment can wear on your self-esteem, volunteering helps you maintain a sense of value and purpose. And helping others is an instantaneous mood booster. Volunteering can also provide career experience, social support, and networking opportunities.
Tip 2: Involve your family for support
Unemployment affects the whole family, so don’t try to shoulder your problems alone. Keeping your job loss a secret will only make the situation worse. Your family’s support can help you survive and thrive, even in this difficult time.
Open up to your family. Whether it’s to ease the stress or cope with the grief of job loss, now is the time to lean on the people who care about you, even if you take pride in being strong and self-sufficient. Keep them in the loop about your job search and tell them how they can support you.
Listen to their concerns. Your family members are worried about you, as well as their own stability and future. Give them a chance to talk about their concerns and offer suggestions regarding your job loss employment search.
Make time for family fun. Set aside regular family fun time where you can enjoy each other's company, let off steam, and forget about your job loss and unemployment troubles. This will help the whole family stay positive.
Helping children cope with a parent’s job loss
Children can be deeply affected by a parent's unemployment. It is important for them to know what has happened and how it will affect the family. However, try not to overburden them with too many emotional or financial details.
- Keep an open dialogue with your children. Children have a way of imagining the worst when they write their own "scripts," so the truth can actually be far less devastating than what they envision.
- Make sure your children know it's not anybody's fault. Children may not understand about job loss and immediately think that you did something wrong to cause it. Or, they may feel that somehowthey are responsible or financially burdensome. They need reassurance in these matters, regardless of their age.
- Children need to feel they are helping. They want to help and having them do something like taking a cut in allowance, deferring expensive purchases, or getting an after-school job can make them feel as if they are part of the team.
Tip 3: Get moving to relieve stress
If work commitments meant that you didn’t have the time to exercise regularly before, it’s important to make the time now. Exercise is a powerful antidote to stress. As well as relaxing tense muscles and relieving tension in the body, exercise releases powerful endorphins to improve your mood. Trimming your waistline and improving your physique may also give your self-confidence a boost.
- Aim to exercise for 30 minutes or more per day—or break that up into short, 10-minute bursts of activity. A 10-minute walk can raise your spirits for two hours.
- Rhythmic exercise—where you move both your arms and legs—is a hugely effective way to lift your mood, increase energy, sharpen focus, and relax both the mind and body. Try walking, running, weight training, swimming, martial arts, or even dancing.
- To maximize stress relief, instead of continuing to focus on your thoughts, focus on your body and how it feels as you move—the sensation of your feet hitting the ground, for example, or the wind on your skin.
Tip 4: Eat well to keep your focus
Your diet may seem like the last thing you should concern yourself about when you’re facing the stress of job loss and unemployment. But what you put in your body can have a huge effect on how much energy you have and how positive you feel.
Minimize sugar and refined carbs. You may crave sugary snacks or comfort foods such as pasta, white bread, potatoes, or French fries, but these high-carbohydrate foods quickly lead to a crash in mood and energy.
Reduce your intake of foods that can adversely affect your mood, such as caffeine, trans fats, and foods with high levels of chemical preservatives or hormones.
Eat more Omega-3 fatty acids to give your mood a boost. The best sources are fatty fish (salmon, herring, mackerel, anchovies, sardines), seaweed, flaxseed, and walnuts.
Avoid nicotine. Smoking when you're feeling stressed may seem calming, but nicotine is a powerful stimulant, leading to higher, not lower, levels of anxiety.
Drink alcohol in moderation. Alcohol temporarily reduces worry, but too much can cause even greater anxiety as it wears off.
Tip 5: Take care of yourself
The stress of job loss and unemployment can take a toll on your health. Now more than ever, it’s important to take care of yourself.
Tips for managing job loss and unemployment stress
Maintain balance in your life. Don’t let your job search consume you. Make time for fun, rest, and relaxation—whatever revitalizes you. Your job search will be more effective if you are mentally, emotionally, and physically at your best.
Get plenty of sleep. Sleep has a huge influence on your mood and productivity. Make sure you’re getting between 7 to 8 hours of sleep every night. It will help you keep your stress levels under control and maintain your focus throughout your job search.
Practice relaxation techniques. Relaxation techniques such as deep breathing, meditation, and yoga are a powerful antidote to stress. They also boost your feelings of serenity and joy and teach you how to stay calm and collected in challenging situations—including job interviews.
Tip 6: Stay positive to keep up your energy
If it’s taking you longer than anticipated to find work, the following tips can help you stay focused and upbeat.
Keep a regular daily routine. When you no longer have a job to report to every day, you can easily lose motivation. Treat your job search like a job, with a daily “start” and “end” time, with regular times for exercise and networking. Following a set schedule will help you be more efficient and productive.
Create a job search plan. Avoid getting overwhelmed by breaking big goals into small, manageable steps. Instead of trying to do everything at once, set priorities. If you’re not having luck in your job search, take some time to rethink your goals.
List your positives. Make a list of all the things you like about yourself, including skills, personality traits, accomplishments, and successes. Write down projects you’re proud of, situations where you excelled, and things you’re good at. Revisit this list often to remind yourself of your strengths.
Focus on the things you can control. You can’t control how quickly a potential employer calls you back or whether or not they decide to hire you. Rather than wasting your precious energy on things that are out of your hands, turn your attention to things you can control during your unemployment, such as learning new skills, writing a great cover letter and resume, and setting up meetings with your networking contacts.
Help yourself to stay on task
If you’re having trouble following through with these self-help tips to cope with job loss and unemployment stress, HelpGuide’s free emotional intelligence toolkit can help.
- Learn how to quickly reduce stress.
- Manage negative thoughts and feelings.
- Motivate yourself to take the steps that can relieve stress and improve your mood.
- Improve your relationships.
- Increase your overall health and happiness.
If you need powerful social and emotional skills that effectively reduce stress, read FEELING LOVED.
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More help for job loss and unemployment stress
- Finding the Right Career: Choosing or Changing Jobs and Finding Satisfaction at Work
- Job Networking Tips: How to Find a Job by Building Relationships
- Volunteering and its Surprising Benefits: Helping Others While Helping Yourself
Resources and references
Coping with job loss and unemployment
Handling Your Job Loss – Advice designed to help you get over your loss and move forward with your quest for employment. (New York State Department of Labor)
How to Handle the Emotional Side of Job Loss and Job Search with Resiliency – Guidelines for skillfully handling the emotional challenge of dealing with job loss and searching for new employment. (Resiliency Center)
Surviving Tough Times: Accepting Your Feelings (PDF) – Guide to recognizing strong feelings triggered by job loss and unemployment and dealing with them in positive ways. (The University of Georgia)
Tips for staying positive and focused during your job search
How to Survive a Layoff – Offers a ten-step to-do list for surviving a layoff. Includes tips for staying calm, finding support, and assessing your career goals. (The Washington Post)
Job-Hunting in a Weak Job Market – Five strategies for staying positive and improving your chances of job success. (Quint Careers)
The Laid-Off Can Do Well Doing Good – Learn about the benefits of volunteer jobs for career development, emotional well-being, and networking. (The Wall Street Journal)
Laid Off? Rethink Goals – Describes how being laid off can be a blessing in disguise, giving you the chance to switch to a job that’s more personally and professionally fulfilling. (The Wall Street Journal)
Find a job club in the U.S.
Job-Hunt: Job Club Directory
The Riley Guide: Networking & Support Groups
Find a job club in other countries
In Australia: Job Searches Australia offers local providers
In Canada: Service Canada offers links to join a job-finding club
In the UK: CAP offers a directory of job clubs
What other readers are saying
“It's been two months and three weeks since my job loss and beginning of my job quest. The article speaks to me directly. While I have heard many of the "tips" about how to get through this transition - and try to follow them - the article goes beyond tips. It offers wisdom and understanding, and helps me to organize this day's job quest with greater energy and resolve.” ~ Wisconsin